Monday 15 October 2007

I am so proud

Grizzlewick is firmly of the belief that "John Howard" is a naughty word.

He gasps and comes running to tell me when people use it on television.

My work here is done.

Tuesday 2 October 2007

Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance

At the risk of causing extreme disappointment to all of our three year old female readers, I have to announce this.

Bundle is well and truly spoken for.

And he has been for years. The child does not have commitment issues.

A delightful young lady, also three, who for the purpose of this blog will be referred to only as Bundle's Girlfriend, has been a part of our delightful son's life for some time now. We first suspected there was some chemistry when she developed a habit of tackling him to the ground at Playgroup, and our suspicions only grew when BGF visited us at home and as soon as he saw her, Bundle yelled her name and threw both arms and one leg in the air and promptly lost his balance entirely.

Although BGF is, according to her own mother, quite high maintenance, Bundle is an easygoing agreeable chap and he's usually willing to accommodate BGF even when she is a little on the demanding side.

Still, it hasn't always been smooth sailing. BGF has a brother who is only about 15 months younger than her, and hence 12 months younger than Bundle. We have already noticed a bit of a tendency for BGF to get slightly stroppy when Bundle spends too much time hanging out with the guys instead of paying attention to her.

Which brings us to last Sunday night, when we took Bundle, Cherub, BGF and BGF's two younger brothers (yes, five children aged three and under) to the Aspendale RSL, because we heard that the guy who does the music will cheerfully take a break from the Johnny Cash impersonations and sing a few kids' songs if more than two or three children turn up on any given night.

The children all had a fantastic time running around the dancefloor like maniacs and crashing into each other, and also occasionally doing some dancing. Bundle was a bit reluctant to get on the dancefloor at first, but Cherub had no such inhibitions and he was soon busting moves with the best of them.

Cherub was quite the hit with a number of older women (one of them must have been at least 4) , and one of the evening's many highlights came when the young lady who had been sitting next to Cherub on the stage and patting his hair stood up and Cherub realised that she was nearly twice his height.

His little face, which is expressive at the best of times, was quite the picture.

BGF didn't mind the odd dance with Cherub too, perhaps thinking that two can play this "hang out with the other's younger brother" game. It seems this was an effective strategy.

As Bundle and BGF were sitting next to each other on the stage during a break between sets, and I was chatting to Honey Bear and BGF's mother, all three of us looked up just in time to see Bundle lean over and, with a confidence his father didn't develop until the age of about 26, plant a gentle kiss full on BGF's lips.

It goes with out saying that this one of the cutest things I have ever seen or which I ever expect to see for the rest of my life. It also goes without saying that Bundle now has to look forward to a lifetime of me reminding him that his first kiss was on stage at the Aspendale RSL.

In case I haven't made this clear enough, I LOVE BEING A PARENT.

Monday 1 October 2007

The Blame Game

Case file: The mysterious case of the burst balloon

Victim: Golly Gosh, aged Three.

Witnesses: Grizzlewick, 4. Ace Gosh, 4, Mr Fix, 35, Mum Gosh, 35, Dad Gosh, 37.


It is alleged that Golly Gosh, owner of a fine ‘wiggly shaped balloon”, lost possession of said balloon on the afternoon of September 27.

Witnesses Mr Fix, Mum and Dad Gosh report hearing the balloon burst, followed by a howling which split the morning with the force of a Metallica concert.

Golly Gosh emerged from the lounge room, where he had last been observed playing alone, to report the damage.

The following is record of investigating officer’s interview with Grizzlewick, 24 hours after the fact.


Investigating Officer Gigglewick: So Golly had a great
balloon?

Grizzlewick: Yes, but it broke!

I/O: Uh-huh. That’s pretty upsetting.

Grizzlewick: Yeah. It made him cry.

I/O: I see. You didn’t break the balloon
though, did you?

Grizzlewick: Yes. No. Ace did.

I/O’s note: Grizzlewick and Ace were not observed in the vicinity of the crime, nor does the forensic evidence suggest they had any involvement in the destruction of said balloon. They were released with no punishment, however the following notes have been appended to Grizzlewick's file:

Recommendation # 1: that subsequent evidence presented by witness Grizzlewick is treated with the utmost caution, and regarded as circumstantial in the prosecution of any crime, real or perceived.

Recommendation # 2: That Grizzlewick’s friends watch their backs. It appears he can go from “Zero” to “Finger-pointing” in under a second.