Victim: Golly Gosh, aged Three.
Witnesses: Grizzlewick, 4. Ace Gosh, 4, Mr Fix, 35, Mum Gosh, 35, Dad Gosh, 37.
It is alleged that Golly Gosh, owner of a fine ‘wiggly shaped balloon”, lost possession of said balloon on the afternoon of September 27.
Witnesses Mr Fix, Mum and Dad Gosh report hearing the balloon burst, followed by a howling which split the morning with the force of a Metallica concert.
Golly Gosh emerged from the lounge room, where he had last been observed playing alone, to report the damage.
The following is record of investigating officer’s interview with Grizzlewick, 24 hours after the fact.
Investigating Officer Gigglewick: So Golly had a great
balloon?
Grizzlewick: Yes, but it broke!
I/O: Uh-huh. That’s pretty upsetting.
Grizzlewick: Yeah. It made him cry.
I/O: I see. You didn’t break the balloon
though, did you?
Grizzlewick: Yes. No. Ace did.
I/O’s note: Grizzlewick and Ace were not observed in the vicinity of the crime, nor does the forensic evidence suggest they had any involvement in the destruction of said balloon. They were released with no punishment, however the following notes have been appended to Grizzlewick's file:
Recommendation # 1: that subsequent evidence presented by witness Grizzlewick is treated with the utmost caution, and regarded as circumstantial in the prosecution of any crime, real or perceived.
Recommendation # 2: That Grizzlewick’s friends watch their backs. It appears he can go from “Zero” to “Finger-pointing” in under a second.
1 comment:
This does remind me of the time that I accidentally introduced the concept of fault to a then 18 month old Bundle. After some truly minor thing went wrong, I assured him it was not his fault. He thought for a moment and then asked "Daddy's fault?" On being advised that that was not the case, rather predictably the next guess was "Cherub's fault?"
A bit harsh for said Cherub, who wasn't in the room at the time.
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