Sunday 6 July 2008

My children could probably learn to spell respect, but somehow the subject just never came up

It has been fun watching Cherub learn to talk. It's particularly entertaining when he gets into a conversation with Bundle that clearly makes perfect sense to the two of them, but is a little bit confusing for the rest of us. I suspect that I will never understand why I went into their room one morning to find that they were both yelling "Norman!" very loudly.

We don't know anyone named Norman and it's not like we've been doing William the Conqueror themed bed time stories or something.

It's also fun because I never know quite what I am going to get called next.

It was another one of these slightly mystifying 'shout a random word' games that started it. As I was strapping the two of them into their car seats one morning, the word of the day seemed to be "PUMPKIN!". It went like this.

Cherub: PUMPKIN!

Bundle: PUMPKIN!

Cherub: PUMPKIN

Bundle: [seeing INC] PUNK!

INC: Did you just call me a punk?

Bundle: Yass

INC: And is that very funny?

Bundle: Yaaaasss!

Cherub: You're a carrot



I don't even know what that means.

For sheer excellence in refusal to take that whole 'respect for parents' thing seriously, Bundle really was at the top of his game. He was more than usually keen to leave for church, as we had told him that his grandparents, who have been away for 6 weeks, would be there today. When he asked if it was nearly time to go for the eighth time, I pointed to my scraggly two-day growth and explained that I needed to shave before going to church, as I didn't want to turn up at church with a beard.

His reply, whilst looking directly at my less than impressive stubble?

"No, everyone would laugh at you"


This was said with most pleasing confidence and certainty.



On hearing this, my lovely wife laughed very loudly and gave our son a high five.

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