It took less than 24 hours from landing at Adelaide airport to my first official child related embarassing moment of this holiday.
I was watching Bundle chatting to hs lovely eleven year old cousin in her room. Spotting a Lift bottle, he announced "It's a bottle. It's for tipping wine, I think".
The previous evening, I had been answering my niece's questions about which church I go to. Now, thanks to Bundle, the same niece thinks I'm a complete alcoholic. It's amazing how clearly a look can say 'bad parent'.
But really, it depends on your point of view. As far as I am concerned, anyone who has a two year old who can not recognise a soft drink bottle is clearly doing something right.
In other news, the same two year old child has just started counting to three whenever I don't respond fast enough to one of his requests. Does anyone have a suggestion on what exactly to say when this happens?
5 comments:
The 'Counting to 3' only works with one of the twins. The other one finishes the counting and then looks at you like an idiot because counting to 3 isn't really such a big deal...
My response is usually, 'ha, well, YOU can count to 3, I can do Long Division, So there...', but petulance doesn't get you anywhere either apparently.
And which church do you go to?
INCraig,
There's nothing so humbling as the glare of a slightly-older-than-yours child to make you feel like a bad, bad parent.
Good work on the lack of softdrink recognition, but don't think it's going to do you any favours when DHS come around to investigate the idea that you're drugging your 2 year old.
In my experience, they will turn EVERYTHING around on you. Grizzlewick likes to stick out his little bottom lip, frown and announce:
"I'm NOT NICE TO YOU. And if you don't stop it I will be VERY CROSS".
To which my response (much like Actonb's) is a bit of petulance: "No, you're NOT nice to me, are you?
He has no answer to that, but neither does it change his mood.
More to the point, what happens when Bundle gets to 3 and you still haven't done as you were told...do you get sent to the naughty step?
i tip wine all the time. and i can't offer anything on the counting to 3 thing. can you help me on how to best counter the most frighteningly logical and out of this world sophisticated-type of arguments that princess puts to me? the only thing separating her from a barrister is that she doesn't actually say "i put it to you that..." and the other scary thing is that she uses her powers for good (ie convincing me re political and/or ecological points, rather than that i should buy her a new skirt).
Actonb
Yes, I have tried petulance. No luck there.
In the interests of trying to stay anonymous, I won't name the church, but it's a reasonably large suburban Baptist church with a well organised children's program.
Gigglewick
Changing a child's mood is close to impossible (except wit Cherb, who is at that wonderful age where tipping him upside down for two seconds appears to reset him to "giggling mode".
Mizanthrop
Fortunately, I am still bigger than Bundle so he can't send me anywhere. Last time this happened, he got around it by just continuing to count until he got to 10, which we all know means he was exercising control over his temper rather than threatening consequences.
MG
Sounds like you need to hire a good lawyer. I would happily take your case for free just for the opportunity to argue with someone logical for a change.
Alternatively, you could post a few examples on our blog here and our team of top notch parents will either provide you with the answers you seek, or possible be equally convinced by the obvious sense of what Princess is saying and end up doing more for the environment.
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